I Can't Resist...

Sorry, I can't resist publishing the following articles from The Onion and The Guardian. They are hilarious but sadly so true...


Man Already Knows Everything He Needs To Know About Muslims
AUGUST 30, 2010 ISSUE 46•35


SALINA, KS—Local man Scott Gentries told reporters Wednesday that his deliberately limited grasp of Islamic history and culture was still more than sufficient to shape his views of the entire Muslim world.
Gentries, 48, said he had absolutely no interest in exposing himself to further knowledge of Islamic civilization or putting his sweeping opinions into a broader context of any kind, and confirmed he was "perfectly happy" to make a handful of emotionally charged words the basis of his mistrust toward all members of the world's second-largest religion.
"I learned all that really matters about the Muslim faith on 9/11," Gentries said in reference to the terrorist attacks on the United States undertaken by 19 of Islam's approximately 1.6 billion practitioners. "What more do I need to know to stigmatize Muslims everywhere as inherently violent radicals?"
"And now they want to build a mosque at Ground Zero," continued Gentries, eliminating any distinction between the 9/11 hijackers and Muslims in general. "No, I won't examine the accuracy of that statement, but yes, I will allow myself to be outraged by it and use it as evidence of these people's universal callousness toward Americans who lost loved ones when the Twin Towers fell."
"Even though I am not one of those people," he added.
When told that the proposed "Ground Zero mosque" is actually a community center two blocks north of the site that would include, in addition to a public prayer space, a 500-seat auditorium, a restaurant, and athletic facilities, Gentries shook his head and said, "I know all I'm going to let myself know."
Gentries explained that it "didn't take long" to find out as much about the tenets of Islam as he needed to. He said he knew Muslims stoned their women for committing adultery, trained for terrorist attacks at fundamentalist madrassas, and believed in jihad, which Gentries described as the thing they used to justify killing infidels.
"All Muslims are at war with America, and I will resist any attempt to challenge that assertion with potentially illuminating facts," said Gentries, who threatened to leave the room if presented with the number of Muslims who live peacefully in the United States, serve in the country's armed forces, or were victims themselves of the 9/11 attacks. "Period."
"If you don't believe me, wait until they put your wife in a burka," Gentries continued in reference to the face-and-body-covering worn by a small minority of Muslim women and banned in the universities of Turkey, Tunisia, and Syria. "Or worse, a rape camp. That's right: For reasons I am content being totally unable to articulate, I am choosing to associate Muslims with rape camps."
Over the past decade, Gentries said he has taken pains to avoid personal interactions or media that might have the potential to compromise his point of view. He told reporters that the closest he had come to confronting a contrary standpoint was tuning in to the first few seconds of an interview with a moderate Muslim cleric before hastily turning off the television.
"I almost gave in and listened to that guy defend Islam with words I didn't want to hear," Gentries said. "But then I remembered how much easier it is to live in a world of black-and-white in which I can assign the label of 'other' to someone and use him as a vessel for all my fears and insecurities."
Added Gentries, "That really put things back into perspective."


....AND here is one more (I can't resist posting) - gotta love the sense of humour of the English!



'Ground Zero mosque'? The reality is less provocative
Millions of Americans are furious about the 'Ground Zero mosque'. But it doesn't exist

Charlie Brooker The Guardian, Monday 23 August 2010 Article history

Things seem awfully heated in America right now; so heated you could probably toast a marshmallow by jabbing it on a stick and holding it toward the Atlantic. Millions are hopping mad over the news that a bunch of triumphalist Muslim extremists are about to build a "victory mosque" slap bang in the middle of Ground Zero.

The planned "ultra-mosque" will be a staggering 5,600ft tall – more than five times higher than the tallest building on Earth – and will be capped with an immense dome of highly-polished solid gold, carefully positioned to bounce sunlight directly toward the pavement, where it will blind pedestrians and fry small dogs. The main structure will be delimited by 600 minarets, each shaped like an upraised middle finger, and housing a powerful amplifier: when synchronised, their combined sonic might will be capable of relaying the muezzin's call to prayer at such deafening volume, it will be clearly audible in the Afghan mountains, where thousands of terrorists are poised to celebrate by running around with scarves over their faces, firing AK-47s into the sky and yelling whatever the foreign word for "victory" is.

I'm exaggerating. But I'm only exaggerating a tad more than some of the professional exaggerators who initially raised objections to the "Ground Zero mosque". They keep calling it the "Ground Zero mosque", incidentally, because it's a catchy title that paints a powerful image – specifically, the image of a mosque at Ground Zero.

When I heard about it – in passing, in a soundbite – I figured it was a US example of the sort of inanely confrontational fantasy scheme Anjem Choudary might issue a press release about if he fancied winding up the tabloids for the 900th time this year. I was wrong. The "Ground Zero mosque" is a genuine proposal, but it's slightly less provocative than its critics' nickname makes it sound. For one thing, it's not at Ground Zero. Also, it isn't a mosque.

Wait, it gets duller. It's not being built by extremists either. Cordoba House, as it's known, is a proposed Islamic cultural centre, which, in addition to a prayer room, will include a basketball court, restaurant, and swimming pool. Its aim is to improve inter-faith relations. It'll probably also have comfy chairs and people who smile at you when you walk in, the monsters.

To get to the Cordoba Centre from Ground Zero, you'd have to walk in the opposite direction for two blocks, before turning a corner and walking a bit more. The journey should take roughly two minutes, or possibly slightly longer if you're heading an angry mob who can't hear your directions over the sound of their own enraged bellowing.

Perhaps spatial reality functions differently on the other side of the Atlantic, but here in London, something that is "two minutes' walk and round a corner" from something else isn't actually "in" the same place at all. I once had a poo in a pub about two minutes' walk from Buckingham Palace. I was not subsequently arrested and charged with crapping directly onto the Queen's pillow. That's how "distance" works in Britain. It's also how distance works in America, of course, but some people are currently pretending it doesn't, for daft political ends.

New York being a densely populated city, there are lots of other buildings and businesses within two blocks of Ground Zero, including a McDonald's and a Burger King, neither of which has yet been accused of serving milkshakes and fries on hallowed ground. Regardless, for the opponents of Cordoba House, two blocks is too close, period. Frustratingly, they haven't produced a map pinpointing precisely how close is OK.

That's literally all I'd ask them in an interview. I'd stand there pointing at a map of the city. Would it be offensive here? What about here? Or how about way over there? And when they finally picked a suitable spot, I'd ask them to draw it on the map, sketching out roughly how big it should be, and how many windows it's allowed to have. Then I'd hand them a colour swatch and ask them to decide on a colour for the lobby carpet. And the conversation would continue in this vein until everyone in the room was in tears. Myself included.

That hasn't happened. Instead, 70% of Americans are opposed to the "Ground Zero mosque", doubtless in many cases because they've been led to believe it literally is a mosque at Ground Zero. And if not . . . well, it must be something significant. Otherwise why would all these pundits be so angry about it? And why would anyone in the media listen to them with a straight face?

According to a recent poll, one in five Americans believes Barack Obama is a Muslim, even though he isn't. A quarter of those who believe he's a Muslim also claimed he talks about his faith too much. Americans aren't dumb. Clearly these particular Americans have either gone insane or been seriously misled. Where are they getting their information?

Sixty per cent said they learned it from the media. Which means it's time for the media to give up.

Seriously, broadcasters, journalists: just give up now. Because either you're making things worse, or no one's paying attention anyway. May as well knock back a few Jagermeisters, unplug the autocue, and just sit there dumbly repeating whichever reality-warping meme the far right wants to go viral this week. What's that? Obama is Gargamel and he's killing all the Smurfs? Sod it. Whatever. Roll titles.

Birthday Wishes and Birthday Tears

Birthday Wishes:

Tuesday was Sammy's birthday. We had all of her little friends over for a party today. Weeks ago, I asked Sammy what theme she wanted for her party. She decided on "Hello Kitty." So I bought "Hello Kitty" napkins, tablecloth, birthday hats, cups etc. Last week, we went to pick out her cake at the bakery. She saw the "Hello Kitty" cake but then she saw the Little Mermaid/Ariel cake and that is what she wanted. Being the flexible mother that I am, I improvised and she had a Hello Kitty/Little Mermaid party. Besides, you are only four once!

Birthday Tears:


Sammy got Tinker Bell underwear for her birthday on Tuesday (when we had the family party). On Wednesday when we had all her friends over for a swimming party, she really wanted to wear her new underwear. However, she needed to wear her swimming suit so she could get wet. She thought she could do both and just wear her underwear over her swimming suit for the party. Obviously, I objected to this duo. It was with great tears and much convincing on my part that she finally gave in. She sobbed to me that they were her very favorite and that she really wanted to show her friends.



Overall, Sammy had a great birthday! She is thrilled to be able to say for REAL now that she is four and feels so grown up!

Licking Ariel while wearing Hello Kitty hat

Even though her eyes are closed in this picture, make no mistake - the girl is HAPPY!

Tossing water balloons

Popping water balloons

After sleeping on curlers, Sammy's hair came out beautiful. However, she wouldn't look at the camera so this is the best I got of her.

Exhausted after a full day at the beach in St. Joseph's, Michigan. Her friend really was asleep, Sammy wasn't far from it.

Hanging out at the beach

Fourth of July weekend at the zoo

Sammy and her alligator friend at the zoo

Summer Time Creativity

So we invited the neighborhood over for a water party. After the slip n' slide got old (I forgot to take pictures of that part) and everyone seemed a bit bored we came up with this. It was a huge hit. I have never seen so many kids crammed in our club house to take their turn on the slide. We had our very own water park! Final count was 18 kids and 4 adults. I wish you could see all the kids crammed in the club house better. It was quite a sight.

This kid went in the pool with the biggest splashes. He soaked me and my camera! Fortunately, my camera still works.

This girl is holding her nose because there was so much water in the pool that you literally went under. Abby was there too, however I somehow didn't get any pictures of her. She did have a huge fit when everyone went home and I deflated the pool though. She would have done it all night, if she could. Now almost daily, she asks me if we can do it again....

Go Sammy!

Look Mom...

Look Mom, I'm as big as you....

...yes, and the shape is exactly the same as well....

FREEDOM at last!

Here is Alexandra on the day she got her cast off. They put ear phones on her because the saw was very loud. She didn't cry at first. I think she was just stunned and not sure what was happening to her.

Here she is a minute or so into the sawing and still not crying. What a brave little baby. You can see Abby, Sammy and my doodles on her cast. I thought I was pretty clever to write "Baby Under Construction" on it. Heh heh!

I love that she is also holding on to the ear phones, bracing herself for what is coming.

It was so nice to see that thing come off.

She started crying after a few minutes. Charles said it was probably from the strong vibration more than the sound.

She was pretty much screaming and really having a fit by this point.

All done! Her legs looked remarkably good. They were a little dry and flaky but nothing too serious. We also found the petals of a little flower under there. (You can see it just above her ankle.) I don't know how that got there. Also, the doctors and nurses said that her cast was one of the CLEANEST they have seen. I took that as a great compliment to myself for being such a fabulous mother and attacking any leaky diapers with severe force. It was a lot of hard work and it made it all worth it for them to say that... I am so good!

It has been fun to watch Alexandra discover her legs. The first day she literally looked at them and felt them with a little puzzled look on her face.

Her cast came off on Thursday and by Saturday she was already rolling over. By the following Tuesday and Wednesday (today) she is scooting herself in reverse and covering some ground. It is so fun to see her progress. I guess the doctor was right, she won't need any physical therapy.

I am loving giving this girl a bath. Charles can't believe how long it takes me but I am just enjoying it so much and so is she. I love having a clean baby for REAL. Abby loves to carry her around and Sammy can now carry her too. They get in fights about who gets to carry her next. I have to limit them though because she will never learn to move if it were up to those two.

She is now also wearing a rhino brace which is NOTHING compared to the cast. It basically goes around her hips and keeps her legs in the spread-out position. It is made of foam. She has to wear it for 20 hours a day until the beginning of August. After that, she will just sleep in it. I have realized when we have taken her out that she prefers the brace to sleep, otherwise she doesn't go to sleep. Who wouldn't want their cozy brace that makes you do the perma-splits while you sleep? Aaaahhh now that's comfort!

Cast-Away

Anybody ready for a party? I am. I want to throw a "Cast-Away" party. Alexandra gets her cast off tomorrow July 1st! We are so excited but at the same time not sure what to expect. Anyway, my party would require a dress code of leis, grass skirts and LEG WARMERS! I feel like we really have something to celebrate since my baby has been in a body cast for 12 WEEKS!!!

I think her legs will be in this spread-out position for a while. It will help though when it comes to trying out for cheerleading... It will probably be pretty painful when she gets the cast off at first as well. Hopefully, she will adjust to life without the cast as well as she did to life with the cast.

She loves her peas just like her sisters did at her age. I can't wait to put her in a REAL high chair so her peas don't drop to the floor so easily.

She can't get enough of her sisters. The cast hasn't stopped Abby from holding her and carrying her all over or Sammy from playing all sorts of games with her.
But life without the cast will make all these things a bit easier.

Alex has made up all kinds of games she plays with us. She sucks anyone around into playing them too. She is quite a joker and easy to get a laugh out of.

We can't wait to give her a bath and cuddle her again. Abby can't wait to put her ladybug swimsuit on her and take her to the pool. Sammy has been counting down the days. Forget July 4th at our house, July 1st is FREEDOM day....

Summer Dinners

Homemade Pita Bread
2 1/4 c. warm water
3 c. all purpose flour
3 c. white wheat flour
2 tsp. salt
2 TBS. vegetable oil
2 TBS. sugar
1 TBS. yeast
Add water, sugar and yeast, and mix. Let sit for 10 minutes until foamy. Add remaining ingredients and mix well. Knead with machine or by hand for 10 minutes. Place in oiled bowl, cover with warm cloth and let rise until doubled in size.

Preheat oven to a piping hot 500 degrees! Turn dough onto floured countertop. Divide into 16 pieces, roll each piece into a ball, and roll out into a 6-7" circle. Set on floured counter, loosely cover.

Place 2 pita circles on a wire cake rack. Place the cake rack directly on oven rack (or on top of baking stone) and bake for 4-5 minutes until lightly browned. Remove and immediately place in a brown paper bag to keep steam inside of bag. Once the pitas are soft, cut in half. Store in plastic bag in refrigerator for several days, or in freezer for up to 2 months.

You start with this...

...after a 500 degree oven you put them in a paper bag....

and then you get this! Aren't they lovely? You can watch them puff up in the oven. They are very good too.

Using these lovely pitas, I then made the following:

Beef Pitas with Yogurt Sauce

1 cup (8oz.) plain yogurt

1/4 cup minced fresh parsley

1/2 teaspoon minced garlic

1/8 teaspoon salt

grated cucumber

Pitas:

1 teaspoon dried oregano

1 teaspoon minced fresh rosemary

salt & pepper

1 pound boneless beef sirloin steak, cut into thin strips

1 large sweet onion, sliced

olive oil

4 whole pitas, warmed

For sauce, in a small bowl, comine the yogurt, parsley, garlic, salt and cucumber. Refrigerate until serving.

Saute onion until golden brown. Remove and keep warm. Saute beef strips in remaining oil until no longer pink.

Serve beef and onion on pitas with yogurt sauce.

And since I am at it, here is one more recipe that is an easy summer dish:

Sausage Veggie Grill

1 pound italian sausage links, cut into 1/2 inch slices

1 medium zucchini, cut into 1 inch slices

1 medium yellow summer squash, cut into 1 inch slices

1 medium red pepper, sliced

1 medium onion, cut into wedges

1 cup quartered fresh mushrooms

(I also added gently boiled red potatoes, diced)

1/4 cup olive oil

1 tablespoon dried oregano

1 tablespoon dried parsley flakes

1 teaspoon garlic salt

1 teaspoon paprika

In a large bowl, combine the first six ingredients. In a small bowl, combine the oil, oregano, parsley, garlic salt and paprika. Pour over sausage mixture; toss to coat. Divide between to pieces of heavy-duty foil. Fold foil around sausage mixture and seal tightly. Grill, covered, over medium heat for 25-30 minutes or until meat is no longer pink and vegetables are tender. Open foil carefully to allow steam to escape.

Enjoy!